Keeping score or giving 100%?

“It’s not about power; it’s about love.”

This is a beautiful statement that I heard last night.

I was sharing with some friends that my husband often gets up with me when I can’t sleep and will make pancakes for me, watch a movie with me or pray for me.

One of our friends was being cheeky and asked him, “how long do you think this power over you will last?” My husband replied, “it’s not about power; it’s about love.”

Beautiful! He summed up the impetus behind our family’s motives and actions much better than I could.

Often we think about relationships in terms of keeping score – making sure we are doing an equal amount of loving acts, favors and signs of affection for one another.

However, there is a more spiritual way to look at things.

Early on in our marriage, my husband and I were given the gift of attending a seminar called “Celebrate marriage!” (we had only been married a couple of weeks at this time). The speaker shared many valuable things; one idea that has stuck with me is that marriage isn’t about each person giving 50%. Marriage is about each person giving 100%. When each person in a marriage gives 100% all the time, there is no withholding of love or affection. Each person is looking for opportunities to give all the time.

Wow, what a revolutionary and spiritual view of relationships! It really symbolizes our relationship to God, who is always pouring out more love than we could ever accept! God’s love is unconditional (this is illustrated in Christ Jesus’ parable of the prodigal son, for instance). And God doesn’t keep score – thankfully! 🙂

So, if we are made in God’s image and likeness that means we are capable of loving unselfishly – the way God loves. We can pour out love to the people around us – taking every opportunity to give and not worry about what we might get in return.

This seems like a tall order, but it’s nothing more than a mental discipline – not giving in to fears about lack, limits or the future that would prevent us from being as generous and as loving as we can be this moment.

Christian healer and teacher, Mary Baker Eddy, wrote:

“Human affection is not poured forth vainly, even though it meet no return. Love enriches the nature, enlarging, purifying, and elevating it.” (Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, p. 57)

And she asks these pointed questions:

“God is Love. Can we ask Him to be more? God is intelligence. Can we inform the infinite Mind of anything He does not already comprehend? Do we expect to change perfection? Shall we plead for more at the open fount, which is pouring forth more than we accept?” (Ibid, p. 2)

Sometimes we may forget just how big and limitless God is. But maintaining this infinite view of God illustrates just how big and limitless the love is that we have to give to each other. And this love blesses us making us feel fulfilled and joyful.

 

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “Keeping score or giving 100%?

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