Mental health & wellness

Sleepless nights?

Reading a recent blog with the following startling statistics prompted me to share my own experience in overcoming this problem.

 People today sleep 20% less than they did 100 years ago.  More than half of Americans lose sleep due to stress or anxiety, with more than 30% of our population suffering from insomnia.  To combat this, approximately 10 million people in the United States use prescription sleep aids (better-sleep-better-life.com).

I never had trouble sleeping until I became pregnant. My evening routine of prayer, reading the Bible or other inspirational material, and writing in my gratitude journal no longer guaranteed me a lasting night of sleep.

What did help?

I went to church one evening and shared this experience with fellow church members. They each had a unique experience and insight to share. One woman shared how she had never needed much sleep in throughout her life. She was able to function perfectly well on just a few hours each night. This skill had enabled her to take far more than the usual credits when she was in graduate school.

Another woman shared how when she woke up in the middle of the night, she prayed for the world and her church. She felt there was a spiritual reason or “calling” for her to be up at the hour (to love her fellow brothers and sisters) and she was able to sleep again after spending time in prayer.

I contacted a Christian Science practitioner for ideas on this subject. She said that she loved waking up during those hours in the night and for her it was like “free time” when she got to do things she couldn’t normally do.

Instead of seeing myself in a dark, lonely house, wishing I was doing something (sleeping) that I was not, I started to appreciate the opportunities this afforded me. I prayed for humanity; I learned more about God; I ate something; I did chores; I worked, etc. I lost the fear and anxiety about being up at that time, and it became very productive for me. Since I was able to accomplish more during that time, I found I could take the opportunity to sleep later in the day when I felt rested and peaceful.

“Siesta” – or nap and resting time – is built-in to the day of many cultures. However, it’s not part of the American culture. My husband told me that his grandfather in South Africa has taken a nap ever day of his life. I realized I didn’t have to be boxed in to what my culture says is “normal” (i.e. sleeping and working in 8 hr blocks). I felt anxiety because I didn’t fit into this mold, and I realized I could step out of this mold and follow a God-directed and inspired schedule. This change in thought really helped me. It didn’t negatively affect my work or the people around me. And it gave me a greater sense of peace and the ability to follow divine inspiration and feel the gentleness of God throughout my day. Sometimes we just need to be a little more gentle on ourselves.

Categories: Health & wellness, Mental health & wellness, Prayer & meditation, Science/Metaphysics, Spirituality & healing, Time & stress | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

It’s all about perspective

My cat brought a small, cool-looking lizard in to the house today. Trying to catch the lizard while stopping the cat from playing with him was challenging. The lizard was fast & freaked out. And eventually ran to a dark hole underneath the dishwasher. I waited for him to come out for an hour or so, but to no avail.

I went to my next appointment thinking about this lizard. Did he know when he woke up this morning that this would be the day when he was captured by a predator & stuck in a dark hole probably left to die?

But on the heels of these dark thoughts came a burst of light. Wait a minute! Was I going to accept the limited perspective of the lizard? Or was I going to see the situation for what it really was? I was right there wanting & waiting to help the lizard & return him to the bright, sunny outdoors where he could continue to live happily.

I thought about how many situations look like this from God’s perspective. God is right there ready & wanting to help us, to rescue us from a dark seeming situation. However because of our limited perspective we freak out, run & hide in the dark, perhaps wanting to work it out on our own.

The lizard was in no real danger when he entered my house; I was right there to help him. I was grateful to realize that the danger was only perceived according to his limited consciousness, & the goodness of the day had never actually left.

When I returned home, I found the lizard sunning himself on the carpet near the window. My husband & I were able to open the door & herd him towards it, at which point he willingly let my husband pick him up & place him outside. He went happily running off.

I was grateful for the opportunity to help this beautiful lizard. And I’m even more grateful for the spiritual lesson I learned about how I can see from God’s perspective more often and trust His ever-present, loving care.

Categories: Fatherhood/Motherhood, Life, Mental health & wellness, Pets & other animals, Prayer & meditation, Spirituality & healing | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Keeping score or giving 100%?

“It’s not about power; it’s about love.”

This is a beautiful statement that I heard last night.

I was sharing with some friends that my husband often gets up with me when I can’t sleep and will make pancakes for me, watch a movie with me or pray for me.

One of our friends was being cheeky and asked him, “how long do you think this power over you will last?” My husband replied, “it’s not about power; it’s about love.”

Beautiful! He summed up the impetus behind our family’s motives and actions much better than I could.

Often we think about relationships in terms of keeping score – making sure we are doing an equal amount of loving acts, favors and signs of affection for one another.

However, there is a more spiritual way to look at things.

Early on in our marriage, my husband and I were given the gift of attending a seminar called “Celebrate marriage!” (we had only been married a couple of weeks at this time). The speaker shared many valuable things; one idea that has stuck with me is that marriage isn’t about each person giving 50%. Marriage is about each person giving 100%. When each person in a marriage gives 100% all the time, there is no withholding of love or affection. Each person is looking for opportunities to give all the time.

Wow, what a revolutionary and spiritual view of relationships! It really symbolizes our relationship to God, who is always pouring out more love than we could ever accept! God’s love is unconditional (this is illustrated in Christ Jesus’ parable of the prodigal son, for instance). And God doesn’t keep score – thankfully! :)

So, if we are made in God’s image and likeness that means we are capable of loving unselfishly – the way God loves. We can pour out love to the people around us – taking every opportunity to give and not worry about what we might get in return.

This seems like a tall order, but it’s nothing more than a mental discipline – not giving in to fears about lack, limits or the future that would prevent us from being as generous and as loving as we can be this moment.

Christian healer and teacher, Mary Baker Eddy, wrote:

“Human affection is not poured forth vainly, even though it meet no return. Love enriches the nature, enlarging, purifying, and elevating it.” (Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, p. 57)

And she asks these pointed questions:

“God is Love. Can we ask Him to be more? God is intelligence. Can we inform the infinite Mind of anything He does not already comprehend? Do we expect to change perfection? Shall we plead for more at the open fount, which is pouring forth more than we accept?” (Ibid, p. 2)

Sometimes we may forget just how big and limitless God is. But maintaining this infinite view of God illustrates just how big and limitless the love is that we have to give to each other. And this love blesses us making us feel fulfilled and joyful.

 

 

 

 

Categories: Fatherhood/Motherhood, Love & relationships, Mental health & wellness, Prayer & meditation, Spirituality & healing, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

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